Saturday, December 31, 2005
Monday, December 19, 2005
Sad, sad day
My Grandpa passed away this morning at 7:15 am. Funny thing is, I was running on the treadmill and at about the same time, I looked through the window at the moon, audibly sobbed, choked back tears, and thought of him, and wondered what everyone else in my family was doing at that moment. Then it passed, I finished my run, and got home to a voicemail from my mom. I still have trouble with God-speak, but the spirit that holds us all together definitely took a hit this morning, and I am grateful I felt the ripple.
My aunt was with him when he died and said the instant he passed, he looked 20 years old again. He was 97, and much, much loved. He'd lived long enough to make peace with estranged children and grandchildren, forgive himself and others for all the slights of life, and to face the afterlife, whatever it may be, with total peace. We know this because for the last couple of years, he would say he was ready for the angels to come.
We were so fortunate to have Grandpa so long, and I am glad he so peacefully moved into the next life. He was a special man to so many, and of course to me, and I will miss his wit, his love, his humor, and his Grandpa-isms.
The really crappy part was I had to go to work and suffer through the day. I waved away the few people who tried to ask about him or offer condolences, and after a daylong meeting, broke down in my office at the end of the day. I had a complete meltdown in the car and on the phone with my brother, who was remarkably philosophical and much more together than I was. Which was good, because then I was prepared to talk to my dad (Grandpa was his father), and we were both ok.
I was surprised at how grief-stricken I was at the news... I had been preparing for a week (he slowly faded...), and, he was 97! But being forced to say goodbye, when in truth he'd been "gone" for a couple of years, was brutal.
Peace to all for the holidays. Peace to my Grandpa... the angels finally came.
H
Monday, December 12, 2005
Christmas House!
So this is just a bit blurry, but here's our house all decorated for Christmas. On Christmas Day, we'll have my mom, dad, brother, sister-in-law, and three-year old Luke. He's so psyched about Christmas... and it's his first in the States!! Luke is my brother's son (technically stepson, but whatever) and they all just moved back from Thailand this past spring. Can't wait for Christmas!
Oh and I didn't get fired. Apparently lawyers are generally irresponsible idiots with little regard for expensive property and break things like laptops all the time... the IT people laughed at my concern. Phew!!!
Sunday, December 11, 2005
This confirms it... (I'm so getting fired)
Definitely NOT taking a laptop to China. I took one to New York and not only was it a colossol pain in the ass with having to haul it out at security... but I also killed it. It slipped off the table at security and the screen is shot... like Jackson Pollack shot.
It was a firm laptop... I'm sooooo getting fired tomorrow.
Sigh.
And I didn't even manage to buy baby loot on 5th Ave. But I did have the best Chinese food since, well, since China.
Check back tomorrow to see if I still have a job.
H
Thursday, December 08, 2005
The Big Apple
I'm in New York for work, but am taking the opportunity to catch up with college friends tomorrow night. We are celebrating the news of our adoption, and it is so nice to be out of the work environment where this is all secret. I had dinner with the partner on the case that's taking up most of my time (and who happens to be my practice group leader) and I think things will be ok when I tell them.
I'm shopping tomorrow on 5th Ave and I will buy Lillie-Kat something. This is odd, but I can't shop without thinking of her. We were Christmas shopping last weekend and I was getting crabby and sort of upset, without knowing why, until I saw an Asian Cabbage Patch Baby and scooped it up for LK. And I swore NO DOLLS. Ooops. Funny thing is that after I bought the thing, I felt so much better. In a way, I just needed to acknowledge her "presence" with us this Christmas. I wanted something so I could say to her one day that we celebrated Christmas without you one year, but we loved you even then, and so we put a present under the tree just for you. Maybe that's over-nostalgic, but whatever.
I bought her a card over Thanksgiving that I will save for the appropriate time. It says "Fate made us a family, but love kept us one. Happy Birthday" I'm think maybe when she's 15 or 16 and bitter about life, she might secretly appreciate something like that.
I'll post when I get back with whatever ridiculous babygear I pick up shopping.
H
Thursday, December 01, 2005
One of our "girls"
Who wouldn't love a face like that? Lillie-Kat doesn't know the loving she's in for from this one -- big dog slurps. To make up for bringing a baby into Isabella's world, I've promised never to be one of those moms that doesn't let the dog kiss the baby.
Obviously, by posting pet pictures, I've got no adoption news to report today.